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The Virtual Vacation Mexico: Coauthors Forever

February 17, 2014 By Laura Davis 12 Comments · · · · · · Read & Respond

The Virtual Vacation Mexico: Coauthors Forever

photo credit: Tracy the Astonishing via cc

One of my favorite things about this year’s San Miguel Writer’s Conference is that my co-author from The Courage to Heal, Ellen Bass, is here teaching poetry and giving a keynote speech. I had the honor of introducing her and preparing my remarks took me on a long trip down memory lane. My introduction was a lot more personal than many of the others I’d heard at the conference—introductions that focused more on accomplishments—after all, I’ve known Ellen intimately for more than 30 years.

I had to edit down my original version to stay within my time limit, but I thought I’d publish the longer version here.

“I first met Ellen Bass when I was 23 years old, three days after I moved to Santa Cruz, California in 1979. I was doing my laundry when I saw her flyer thumbtacked to a bulletin board—advertising her women’s writing workshop, Writing About Our Lives. Two days later, I was sitting in a living room with a dozen women and Ellen, and it was there that we embarked on the first incarnation of our relationship: she was my teacher. And a damn good teacher, too. Over the past 45 years, tens of thousands of writers have attended Ellen’s classes & workshops—many going on to develop strong literary careers of their own.

“Eventually, Ellen and I became friends, and in 1985, two years after she published the groundbreaking anthology, I Never Told Anyone—where women for the first time shared their stories of being sexually abused, I asked Ellen to collaborate with me on a book about healing from child sexual abuse. At first Ellen said no. She knew what it took to write a book and I didn’t. She had a family and a career, her life was full already. But I didn’t take no for an answer. And a few months later I got a card in the mail with balloons on the front and a single word inside—yes. And so our lifelong work collaboration began.

“I wrote my part of The Courage to Heal on the first Macintosh computer—a Mac 128. Ellen, a Luddite at heart, was still using a typewriter, editing her drafts using scissors and scotch tape. So whatever Ellen wrote, I had to retype into my computer. This was a long time ago.

“During the three and a half years it took us to write The Courage to Heal, Ellen was my mentor; I was the driving force that pushed our book through to completion. Ellen and I were living in separate cities at the time; we spent days at a time camped in each other’s houses, working day and night.  Nothing got in the way of finishing the book. I can still remember Ellen with her back out, lying on ice on her living room floor, her editing pencil in hand. Ellen’s son Max, now 26, was conceived in my San Francisco apartment, during a break in one of our work marathons. In a collaboration like ours, you get to know each other intimately. As we’ve always joked, our relationship has been like a long-term marriage—without the sex.

“In the thirty years we’ve been actively tending The Courage to Heal, Ellen and I have worked together on three new editions, audio books, and a sequel. And it was through our book’s long controversial life that I really learned about Ellen’s commitment and generosity. When I was pregnant with my son, Eli, now 21, our book was being pilloried from coast to coast. As my milk came in and I tended my infant son, Ellen flew off, again and again, to defend our book—and the survivors we wrote it for—on national  TV.

“In the decades since then, Ellen has moved back to her first love—poetry—and the recognition and accolades she’s received prove she made the right decision. Ellen has won the Pushcart Prize, the Eliston Book Award, The Pablo Neruda Prize among many others.  Her poems are regularly featured in the New Yorker and on The Writer’s Almanac. Pulitzer prize winning Poet Laureate Philip Levine calls Ellen ‘a poet with terrific power.’ Marie Howe says Ellen’s poems ‘sing their joy.’ And Frank Gaspar calls her new book, ‘a gift, a blessing, a map, a chronicle, a hymn and a cry—and most of all a dazzling masterful work of art.’

“Two of Ellen’s outstanding books of poetry are available in the conference bookstore: The Human Line and Mules of Love. Today she will read from her forthcoming book, Like a Beggar.

“Ellen Bass’ poems will disturb you, comfort you, charm and delight you. They will break you open with their fierce insistence on joy. They are poems that make you want to call up a friend and say, ‘Listen to this.’

“They are the unforgettable poems of a mature poet at the height of her creative power. It is a great honor for me to present my colleague, my co-author, and my dear friend, Ellen Bass.”

The Virtual Vacation Mexico: Coauthors Forever

photo credit: Beverly Sky

It was a real treat for me to introduce Ellen, and then to sit back and listen to her speech. Ellen read poems from her collections Mules of Love and The Human Line, and also introduced a number of poems from her forthcoming book, Like a Beggar. Then she took us behind the scenes to tell us how many of her poems were made—and in the process taught all of us a lot about craft—whether we were poets or not.

Here were a few of my favorite quotes from her talk:

A poem begins with the writer and ends with the reader.

Everything you put on the page is temporary until you find something better.

One of the gifts of poetry is that it’s a space in which you can look at things from a different perspective. You can take your pain—your losses, your sorrows and angers—and approach them with curiosity, instead of just trying to make them go away.

I like to say yes as much as possible.

And this is one of the poems I loved best from her new collection, Like a Beggar:

At the Padre Hotel in Bakersfield, California

Its Saturday night and all the hererosexuals
in smart little dresses and sport coats
are streaming into what we didn’t know
was the hottest spot between Los Vegas and L.A.
Janet and I are in jeans and fleece–not a tube of lipstick
or mascara wand between us. Grayheads:
a species easy to identify without a guidebook,
the over-the-hill lesbian couples of the Pacific Northwest.
Janet’s carrying our red-and-white cooler with snacks for the road
across the marble tiles of the Art Deco Lobby
when we turn and see the couple
entering through the tall glass doors, slicing
through the crowd like a whetted blade. The butch
is ordinary enough, a stocky white woman
in tailored shirt and slacks, but the confection–
no, the piéce de résistance–whose hand she holds
is of another genus entirely.
Her cinnamon sheen, her gold dress
zipped tighter than the skin of a snake.
And her deep décolletage, exposed enough for open-heart surgery.
She’s a yacht in a sea of rowboats.
An Italian fountain by Bernini.
She’s the Statue of Liberty. The Hubble Telescope
that lets us gaze into the birth of galaxies.
O, may they set that hotel room ablaze–here
in this drab land of agribusiness and oil refineries,
outdoing Pittsburgh as the top polluted city in the nation–trash it
like rock stars, rip up the 300 thread-count sheets,
free the feathers from the pillows.
And may that grand femme be consumed
right down to the glitter on her sling-back, four-inch stilettos
and whatever she’s glued on her magnificent skin
to keep the plunge of that neckline from careening clear off the curve.

Isn’t that marvelous?

You can order this wonderful collection, due out from Copper Canyon Press in March, directly from Ellen at her website. If you’re like to hear Ellen read some of her own poems, you can go here.

Filed Under: Mexico, The Virtual Vacation Tagged With: creative writing, Ellen Bass, entrepreneur, marketing, memoir, mexico, poetry, teaching, travel, writing practice, writing tips

« Previous Post: The Virtual Vacation Mexico: The Loneliest Book Club in the World
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Comments

  1. Karla says

    February 17, 2014 at 11:39 am

    Hi Laura, the new website design is beautiful and sleek, with lots of great content. I am really enjoying this series of the virtual vacation, especially this post and the one about saying good bye to your Mom. I think I remember reading this series last year, and she had something hilarious to say as you were leaving, something along the lines of that your @ss looked great in the pants you were wearing? Your posts about her are always rounded with warmth and love. So is your introduction of Ellen, whose poetry is gorgeous. Enjoy the rest of the conference and I’ll be by reading about it.

    Reply
    • Laura Davis says

      February 17, 2014 at 9:16 pm

      Thanks, Karla. I’m glad you’re finding the time to read and I hope it’s giving you truly a “virtual vacation” from your life. I know you can use it right now. Sending love!

      Reply
  2. Mary Lasher says

    February 17, 2014 at 5:42 pm

    What a beautiful tribute to your friend and cohort, Ellen. We should all be so blessed to have “an Ellen” in our lives! I enjoyed the poem that you shared… especially since my other half is quite the diva! She would be thrilled to be referred to as “The Hubble Telescope”! I look forward to reading more of her work.
    I hope you continue to have a wonderful time at the conference… thank you for sharing your experiences with us.

    Reply
    • Laura Davis says

      February 17, 2014 at 9:39 pm

      I’m glad you loved Ellen’s poems. They’re all quite wonderful. I highly recommend that you try one of her collections.

      Reply
  3. Ellen Bass says

    February 18, 2014 at 2:58 pm

    Dear Laura,
    Thank you for that beautiful introduction that, as you saw, made me cry. It also gave me great pleasure to take that trip down memory lane with you and think about all that we’ve shared together. You’re a treasure of a teacher and a writer and a true friend.
    Love,
    Ellen

    Reply
    • Laura Davis says

      February 18, 2014 at 3:04 pm

      Thanks Ellen. Isn’t technology amazing? I assume you’re back in Santa Cruz already and I’ve just arrived in Patscuaro and here we are communicating instantaneously. I loved sharing the week with you, too, only wish we’d gotten to hang out more! I hope you get some rest after all of that. I’m so glad I arranged to get some here! See you back in Santa Cruz.

      Reply
    • Jane Morgan says

      February 22, 2014 at 10:40 am

      Ellen, a fine introduction and a great poem, except for THE PITTSBURGH ERROR! My beloved city, now green and thriving! You need to visit the place again–the museums, the symphony, the Phipps Conservatory with its all-green building, taking up no natural resources.
      Keep going, Ellen. You’re always an inspiration, in spite of Pittsburgh,
      Jane M.

      Reply
      • Laura Davis says

        February 22, 2014 at 3:18 pm

        Hi Jane…I hear that Pittsburgh is a wonderful city. Thanks for defending your beloved city!

        Reply
  4. Gwenn says

    February 19, 2014 at 12:45 pm

    Wow! Now that was a poem. Blew me away. What a beautiful tribute you paid your friend. Thanks for sharing it with all of us. We still have not met one on one – I did one of your free write evenings ages ago – but want to thank you for “The Courage to Heal.” It was a major support for me when I was working so hard to find myself and letting the truth of my childhood surface. Bless the two of you forever for your courage in writing it and defending it. What a masterpiece!

    Reply
    • Laura Davis says

      February 19, 2014 at 2:47 pm

      Gwen, thank you so much!

      Reply
  5. Tom Griffen says

    February 21, 2014 at 8:47 am

    Wow – that was a hack of a presentation. I am a new writer, currently studying with Ellen at Pacific – and your post not only made me feel gloriously lucky to to have her as a mentor, but it also reinforced the deep strength and necessity of our writing communities. The personal and professional connection between you and Ellen is what life’s all about – and the mere thought of such a thing existing in my future with writing pals of my own brought tears to my eyes. Thanks for sharing this. -tom

    Reply
    • Laura Davis says

      February 21, 2014 at 2:35 pm

      Tom, welcome to my site and thanks for your kind words. You are in fact very lucky to study with Ellen. She’s an amazing teacher, mentor and human being. I hope in your writing future that you are lucky enough to find your own “Ellen.”

      Reply

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Like this Virtual Vacation?

You can also read about Laura’s travels to:

Peru 2017

In which Laura and Karyn and 18 writers explore Machu Picchu and the Sacred Valley of Peru.

Serbia 2017

In which Laura leads a workshop at the Incest Trauma Center.

Greece 2016

In which Laura explores the wonders of Crete and Santorini with a wide-eyed group of Write, Travel, Transform adventurers.

Vietnam 2015/16

In which Laura, who grew up during the Vietnam War, goes to Southeast Asia and finds out what Vietnam, Laos and Cambodia are really like today.

Commonweal 2015

A journey toward healing loss and grief in a magnificent Northern California setting.

Scotland 2015

In which Laura returns to Scotland with a new group for another jaunt through the wonders of the Scottish Highlands.

Scotland 2013

In which Laura attends the Edinburgh theatre festival and leads 14 writers to a magical retreat in the highlands of Northern Scotland.

Bali 2013

In which Laura visits Australia, and spends three weeks diving, exploring, and teaching in three regions of Bali.

Florida 2014

A journey into old age in America in which Laura brings her 86-year-old mother to Florida so she can see her last surviving sister one final time.

Mexico 2014

In which Laura attends the San Miguel Writer’s Conference and explores the artistic towns around Patzcuaro.

About Laura Davis

In the course of my career as a communicator, I have also worked as a columnist, talk show host, radio reporter, radio producer, blogger, editor, and speaker. Words have always been at the core of my work and my self-expression. Read More . . .

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Retreating with Laura: Julie Sheehan

Julie Sheehan

For many years I put off my dream of writing and traveling. I told myself the kids were too little, my husband could never survive without me, that I couldn't possibly be so selfish. I couldn't imagine realistically stepping out of all of my responsibilities and roles. Then I started attending Laura’s summer retreat at Commonweal in northern California and that became an annual gift to myself for the next three years.

When the opportunity to travel with Laura internationally came up, my Land of Later mentality said I could never pull it off. But when my friend got cancer at age 39, I decided to stop taking life and it's endless opportunities to grow, live, nurture and explore myself for granted.

My children were 6 and 9 when I began allowing myself the luxurious pleasure of taking 10 days to two weeks each year to travel abroad with Laura, to spend time with like minded, soul searching people who share a passion for living and writing, to have all my meals prepared for me, to have the space and freedom to stretch out of my cage and check in with who I am, what I want, and how best to get there.

Laura is a skilled and nurturing teacher who encourages her students to take risks, to grow as human beings, and to be vulnerable. She has provided me with a forum where I can gain all my CEUs and learn techniques on how to become a more engaging writer, all while completing yearly emotional rehab.

I return home from each of Laura’s trip a little wiser, a little more open, and a lot more compassionate. I greet my family, friends and daily life with sparkly, clean energy and a renewed patience, brought about by way of re-writing old stories that I needed to let go of. I come home ready to move forward in my life.

A retreat with Laura Davis is one of the best gifts I ever received and gave myself. It took many years to realize that I was worth the time and financial investment, but now there is no looking back.

Julie Sheehan, Livermore California

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