In ten days, I will be boarding a plane to Brisbane. I am flying to a city, a region, a country, a continent I have never been to before. I am 56 years old and there are many places in this wide, beautiful world where I have never been. I am seriously under-traveled and unfortunately, monolingual. But I’m trying to make up for lost time. Eleven days from now, I will be landing in the Gold Coast Region of Australia to visit my friend Allison. I met Allison a year ago when she piled out of a dusty van in front of the Lotus Bungalows resort in Candidasa, along with 15 other travelers who attended my first Write, Travel, Transform retreat in Bali last year. Most of us were ... [Continue Reading]

My favorite part of getting ready for this trip (aside from picking up a very thick wad of brightly colored Balinese rupiah at the bank) has been saying “no.” For the past few weeks, I’ve been divesting myself of obligations and saying no to new work, new projects, new requests, and new ideas:

“No, I’m sorry, I can’t read your manuscript.” “No, I’m sorry, I can’t meet with you.” “Oh that’s a really good idea, but I’m going to have to pass right now.” “I agree. It’s unfortunate that you just joined my class and now I’m taking the summer off. But I’ll be back in the fall.” “Call me in September about that.” “I’m not interested in doing that any more. I’m moving in new directions. I’m sorry.” “Look, if you want to do that, go right ahead. But I don’t think ... [Continue Reading]

There is something very satisfying and freeing about all the last minute things that need to be done before a trip:

• Calling the bank to tell them I’ll be out of the country
• Putting a vacation message on my email account freeing me from the need to answer email for a month
• Putting a vacation hold on my mail and the newspaper
• Getting my toenails done (I rarely do this, but always before a big trip)
• Packing up my c-pap machine, my thyroid medicine and my vitamins
• Packing the cords, adapters and plugs for my electronics
• Turning “data” off on my phone
• Shutting off notifications from Facebook, Pinterest and other social media—amazing how my email reduced by half instantly
• Double-checking my ... [Continue Reading]

Many of you are already familiar with my 85-year-old mother, Temme, who I moved out to California four years ago. She lives in Sunshine Villa, an assisted living facility about ten minutes from our house. Yesterday the last thing I did after all my errands and the final check of my bags was to go over to say goodbye. When I got to her door, I knocked. I usually carry a key to let myself in, but I’d already stashed it, along with my safe deposit key, in a baggie in my underwear drawer. “Mom,” I yelled from outside Room 103, “Open the door.” She yelled back, “Come in!” “I DON'T HAVE A KEY,” I yelled louder. “You’re going to have to let me in.” She, louder: “COME IN!” “I can’t! I don’t HAVE A KEY!” I knocked and called two more times. Then I waited a long time, five ... [Continue Reading]